When two people in a marriage feel that it is no longer possible to continue, they can move to divorce. Unfortunately, most of the time, a divorce is unpleasant and causes many hurt feelings. Depending on the reason for the split, the ex-partners may find themselves embroiled in a bitter battle for custody, possession of assets, and alimony. It can be brutal, but there is hope.

Amicable divorces are a possibility, though they do require some work on both sides. It’s natural to feel some animosity as you divide up your belongings and end life together. However, with the following tips, you can keep things friendly.

Determine Your End Goals

Chances are, both of you have similar goals for the divorce. If you have children, you want them to be taken care of and happy, which usually means avoiding conflict involving them.

It’s a good idea to talk with your ex and try to find a middle ground so you can both be content with the way things are. This doesn’t mean you’ll both be happy . . . often a good compromise means neither party is entirely thrilled with the outcome. That’s part of the negotiation.

Pick Your Battles

It’s best to avoid fighting over every little thing. Do you really care if the Christmas tree goes to the other person? By choosing only the most important battles, you’ll find it simpler to work through the divorce and sort everything rapidly.

You may find it helpful to come to agreements on as much as possible and then have your lawyers work out the remaining issues. This eliminates much of the harsher side of divorce and allows for a friendlier discussion. Your lawyer will work with you to help you reach the best possible outcome while your ex’s lawyer will do the same.



Consider Writing Everything

Not only does writing out what you want to say allow you to keep a proper record of the conversation, it has other benefits, too. In the heat of the moment, it’s very difficult to speak civilly to your ex. You’ll find that arguing happens more face to face than via text or email, so it can be useful to write out your thoughts and send them, rather than call and talk to your ex or speak to them in person.

Writing also allows you to think more about what you’re saying and to revise as needed. The other person may then take their time to consider what you’ve written before responding. This can save quite a few arguments over time.

Divorce is never simple or easy and there are bound to be bad feelings from time to time. However, when done with conscious thought to the process and consideration for each other, it is possible to have an amicable breakup.

Are you planning a divorce? Let us help it go smoother. Contact North Ford Solicitors for more information on how we can help.